Tansy Undercrypt
Author, Illustrator, Purveyor of Doom & Whimsy


June 30th 2016

Smeagol’s extended family moved away and separated themselves from the story of the one ring as much as they could. When that blasted hobbit published his horrible account, however, they were (again) tracked until they were found and swarmed by paparazzi day and night. “It was cursed!” Fleemgol (fifth cousin, thrice removed) cried out, exasperated […]

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June 29th 2016

“Ready, Dad?” Ed called from the living room. “Almost now; almost,” came the reply. Clement moved slowly from the mirror where he’d wrangled his tie into something sharp (arthritis be damned). Back at the dresser, he opened a hand-carved box and stared at the stones revealed inside. “Who needs somethin’ today?” he whispered. “Who got […]

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June 28th 2016

“What’s there to do around here?” Debbie asked the front desk person. He pointed over to a rack of brochures. “Plenty,” he said, but leaned in and added. “Just … come back to your room before sundown. Everybody changes here at sundown.” He leaned back, checking over both shoulders to make sure his boss hadn’t […]

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June 27th 2016

“The hardest thing?” Dracula repeated, fascinated by the question. “Well, the sheer scope of it, I suppose.” He paused, reflective. “It can honestly be said that, when I love, I love forever. The implications are, of course, frightening and a bit sad.” He looked off, out of the window into someplace else, and sighed. “I […]

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Spontaneous Part Two: Narnia

June 26th 2016

Carlie never went back, preferring to draw a permanent line between that life and this one. Max went back only once, as a grown man, finding the door in an overgrown thicket and prying it open very carefully. The cellar was the same as before, but more organized. It was clear that his family no […]

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June 25th 2016

“You either don’t ever get involved or you use this,” L said, holding up the thingie. “Dude,” R responded, “you know that’s unauthorized use of Men In Black equipment for personal reasons.” “I know,” L said. “And you can’t just blot yourself from someone’s mind because the romance didn’t work out. That makes you – […]

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June 24th 2016

Elliott had been the one to suggest being workout buddies; Baron had sat there for what felt like a long time. “I think it could work,” he said at last, “but we need to cover a few details.” “Pick up the pace,” Baron growled a few weeks later, his hot breath on the back of […]

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June 23rd 2016

Ursula sighed. “Let me guess,” she said, her mouth in a tight line that turned down at the corners, looking at them out of the corner of her eye. “You want to trade something you think you’ll never miss for your one sorry shot at love.” They trembled inside the mouth of the cave, nodding […]

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June 22nd 2016

They agreed on the plan and began carrying Post-It notes everywhere, in pockets and purses and impressive leather folios. They started their days at diners and coffee shops, then moved to restaurants and delis, finishing up at sports bars and 4-star foodie palaces. They would send over food with a note that read, “Please eat […]

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June 21st 2016

Carlie was there, outside, when he looked. It was just past midnight and Max was quietly zipping up his loaded backpack. He gave her the signal to wait and he took his time suiting up and climbing down. “Hey,” he said, below a whisper. “Hey,” she mouthed back. She was trembling although the night was […]

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