Tansy Undercrypt
Author, Illustrator, Purveyor of Doom & Whimsy


March 20th 2017 in Microfiction

“Well, the first thing we do is get them into counseling,” Lord Chamberlain told the reporter. “These women are not ready for the rigors of royal life – not by any stretch of the imagination.” “Because they’re commoners or have been away from castle life for so long that they lack the refinement they need?” the reporter prompted. “GOOD HEAVENS, NO!” exclaimed Lord Chamberlain. “That’s not it at all!” “I’m sorry,” the reporter said, surprised at his subject’s visceral reaction. “These women,” Lord Chamberlain said, leaning forward and pointing, “these remarkable women have endured incredible trials. One was treated as a slave by her family; one was poisoned by her stepmother; one was drugged and left in a coma; the list goes on and on.” “I … I meant no offense,” the reporter stammered. “When you have someone like MuLan, for example, who has been so selfless, so courageous, but has seen so much war and death … teaching her how to receive visiting dignitaries is not our #1 concern. These young ladies need rest and food and comfort.” “Of course … I’m sorry,” the reporter repeated, not knowing what else to say.

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Sooner or later, you get back to basics. You have to (nobody let you forget where you from). I’m still that skinny black kid that was never gonna rock and roll, y’know? Forces intervened; they did for me and they will for you. But you best not forget yourself; stay true to what you got, […]

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“I love it here,” Jenny said, looking out at the rolling hills and the woods beyond. “I’m so glad,” her grandmother said. “It’s good to have you visit.” “Please don’t ever sell the farm,” Jenny added. “All of my best memories are here.” “No plans to sell,” Grandmother comforted, “although it will need someone to […]

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