Tansy Undercrypt
Author, Illustrator, Purveyor of Doom & Whimsy


December 31st 2012 in Microfiction

After the opera, Joan’s date opened great leathery wings, gripped her in his talons, and flew her away. He peeked at her while flying and she was looking around, not squirming. He swooped into a deluxe crypt in an unknown city, where he lit a fire and pushed her onto a red velvet chaise, biting her in the neck. He peeked at her while biting and she was looking around, not screaming. “Look,” he said, straightening up, “I’m obviously a vampire and you’re obviously my victim. Doesn’t that concern you in the least?” Joan smiled at him pleasantly and replied, “You’re handsome, intelligent, an excellent conversationist, and clearly have a unique sense of interior design.” He raised both eyebrows. “At least I won’t die of boredom,” she continued. “I’ve had WAY worse dates than this.”

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The Merrimather-Waitings and the Clocksmith-Caruthers attended the fete, drawn by its [BLANK] and obvious [BLANK]. Secretly, both parties were delighted to [BLANK].

(Illustration by Edward Gorey)

Tansy’s answer:  free food, new year timeliness, wear clothing as garish as the wallpaper out in public. (Post your own answers and read the genius of others on the Tansy Undercrypt […]

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“Of all of the fun things that you’re going to do in the new year, can someone tell me one thing you tried that you won’t do again – something you want to leave behind?” Mrs Strauss asked her fourth grade class. Everyone fidgeted, but no one answered. “Wyatt?” she asked the small, blonde boy […]

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