Tansy Undercrypt
Author, Illustrator, Purveyor of Doom & Whimsy


May 22nd 2017

“I’ll give you these for the cow,” the peddler said, extending his hand. “Some beans? What? Are you joking?” Jack replied. “These are magic beans, son; they’ll open a doorway to a whole new reality.” Jack drew closer as the peddler pointed. “The blue one will shake things up, but you’ll keep your happy ending. […]

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April 24th 2017

“Mirror, mirror, on the wall,” she began. “Just don’t,” the mirror said. “Uh … who’s the fairest …,” she continued. “I’m not answering,” the mirror interrupted angrily. “… of them all … exactly WHAT is the matter with you?” she finished and countered. “You’ve been scrying,” it answered and she blushed. “You’ve been staring into […]

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April 14th 2017

“Are they all here in the warehouse?” Steve asked, marveling at the size of the place. “The haunted mirror? The singing mice? The dancing brooms?” Maeve laughed. “No, they’re not all here. This is just one building; there are several more – much like The Smithsonian.” “The grandmotherly teapot and the bumbling utensils? The flying […]

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March 20th 2017

“Well, the first thing we do is get them into counseling,” Lord Chamberlain told the reporter. “These women are not ready for the rigors of royal life – not by any stretch of the imagination.” “Because they’re commoners or have been away from castle life for so long that they lack the refinement they need?” […]

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January 9th 2017

A scraping and a tapping came from the back room of Gepetto’s workshop; the guides exchanged glances. “Is there someone at work in there?” asked one of the tourists. “Can we see what’s going on?” asked another. “The back rooms of the workshop are closed for repair,” said one of the guides. “I’m sorry.” A […]

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October 18th 2016

“Once upon a time,” the elfmother read, “the Nonmagicals, in their grim, grey cities far from the green wood, grew restless …” Her child gasped. “They’re not coming here, are they? Please don’t let them come here.” “Oh, Child,” she said, drawing a sigil upon the air to increase the warmth of the fire, “they’re […]

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July 20th 2016

Steve watched from across the street as the man’s family (maybe 20 of them) hugged and kissed him at the station and then carefully helped him onto the bus. There were tears and cheers and enthusiastic waving until the engine revved to go. They respectfully backed away, turned, and did not look back. “Why did […]

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Spontaneous Part Two: Narnia

June 26th 2016

Carlie never went back, preferring to draw a permanent line between that life and this one. Max went back only once, as a grown man, finding the door in an overgrown thicket and prying it open very carefully. The cellar was the same as before, but more organized. It was clear that his family no […]

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June 23rd 2016

Ursula sighed. “Let me guess,” she said, her mouth in a tight line that turned down at the corners, looking at them out of the corner of her eye. “You want to trade something you think you’ll never miss for your one sorry shot at love.” They trembled inside the mouth of the cave, nodding […]

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June 14th 2016

“So you bought a wand on the black market?” the reporter asked. “Yes, that’s how it started,” Cinderella replied. “They come fully charged and you can use them – as a normal, non-magical person – to do a number of things before they fade.” “And what did you do with it?” came the next question. […]

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