Tansy Undercrypt
Author, Illustrator, Purveyor of Doom & Whimsy


December 16th 2017

*LANGUAGE WARNING: use of raw slang terminology; reader discretion is advised* “You know that this isn’t going to end well, yes?” the Mirror asked rhetorically, sharing his viewpoint from the wall. She stared at him, her eyes cold. “I am required, through my enchantment, to provide you with the information you seek,” the Mirror continued, […]

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November 8th 2017

“This is spectacular,” Greta said, looking into the box. She carefully pulled out one lock of hair, a blonde curl tied with a tiny pink ribbon. “There are I don’t know how many in here – mementos of every child she ever loved.” A door opened, then closed, and Hans was at her elbow. She […]

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July 3rd 2017

“Ivan, I need a favor,” she asked quietly, sitting down. “How did you know it was me?” the wolf said, sitting off a calculated distance (so that it could it could fight or flee if necessary). “Uh … talking wolf, Ivan’s eyes, that whole “grandmother stunt” is the realm of the practical joker,” she replied, […]

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June 26th 2017

“What I mean is she’s solid – she’s solid magically,” he said. “No one is judging her,” the other replied. “And yet reason dictates we consider the irascibility of fairy magic and build that into the equation.” “I am not advocating rushing into this, but we want to draw the right power to our effort,” […]

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May 22nd 2017

“I’ll give you these for the cow,” the peddler said, extending his hand. “Some beans? What? Are you joking?” Jack replied. “These are magic beans, son; they’ll open a doorway to a whole new reality.” Jack drew closer as the peddler pointed. “The blue one will shake things up, but you’ll keep your happy ending. […]

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April 24th 2017

“Mirror, mirror, on the wall,” she began. “Just don’t,” the mirror said. “Uh … who’s the fairest …,” she continued. “I’m not answering,” the mirror interrupted angrily. “… of them all … exactly WHAT is the matter with you?” she finished and countered. “You’ve been scrying,” it answered and she blushed. “You’ve been staring into […]

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April 14th 2017

“Are they all here in the warehouse?” Steve asked, marveling at the size of the place. “The haunted mirror? The singing mice? The dancing brooms?” Maeve laughed. “No, they’re not all here. This is just one building; there are several more – much like The Smithsonian.” “The grandmotherly teapot and the bumbling utensils? The flying […]

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March 20th 2017

“Well, the first thing we do is get them into counseling,” Lord Chamberlain told the reporter. “These women are not ready for the rigors of royal life – not by any stretch of the imagination.” “Because they’re commoners or have been away from castle life for so long that they lack the refinement they need?” […]

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January 9th 2017

A scraping and a tapping came from the back room of Gepetto’s workshop; the guides exchanged glances. “Is there someone at work in there?” asked one of the tourists. “Can we see what’s going on?” asked another. “The back rooms of the workshop are closed for repair,” said one of the guides. “I’m sorry.” A […]

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October 18th 2016

“Once upon a time,” the elfmother read, “the Nonmagicals, in their grim, grey cities far from the green wood, grew restless …” Her child gasped. “They’re not coming here, are they? Please don’t let them come here.” “Oh, Child,” she said, drawing a sigil upon the air to increase the warmth of the fire, “they’re […]

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