Tansy Undercrypt
Author, Illustrator, Purveyor of Doom & Whimsy


February 27th 2017

“I was wondering about your custom leatherwork,” said the caller. “Yep,” Jack said. “We do a lot of unique pieces; we’ve used just about every kind of leather.” “That’s wonderful,” the caller responded. “Would you have any problem making something out of human skin? I understand if it’s more.” Jack rolled his eyes. They got […]

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February 4th 2017

“The transformation is not romantic,” Warren told the newbies (who were hanging on his every word), “and you will not have omnipotent power. The full moon does not beam your sorry behind into a high budget Hollywood film. Your bones will break; your cartilage will explode in order to reconfigure; your skin will shred; it […]

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December 9th 2016

Jim sat in his car, not sure why he couldn’t turn it off and get out. Holiday music blared on the lot and lights twinkled, strung into a makeshift awning. “So many trees,” Jim whispered, hands still gripping the wheel tightly. “Doesn’t the forest miss all of its trees?” Someone banged on his car; Jim […]

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November 30th 2016

“I just don’t want to die in a stupid way,” he said, wringing his hands. “I just don’t want that to be the only thing memorable about me.” The old gypsy woman smiled slightly. “You will have a long life … ” “Okay, but I don’t want to die on the toilet or roll off […]

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November 8th 2016

“New to this?” the angel said, turning slightly. “Yep,” the other replied, eyes widening as he took it all in. “It looks bad – it always looks bad – but, in the end, everything turns out okay,” the first said in a comforting tone. “If you say so,” came the reply, full of doubt and […]

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November 5th 2016

“Romania has the best taxi service in the world – the easiest scheduling, the best (and friendliest) drivers, and the lowest fares,” Helen said, smiling and holding open the door. “That surprises me,” Carl replied. “Is tourism that important?” “Airport,” Helen said to the cabbie, who nodded. “It’s not the tourism, it’s … the Dragon.” […]

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October 27th 2016

“What’s the weirdest thing you ever saw?” Marge asked him, and Buck put both elbows on the bar. “Tough one,” he answered. “I’ve passed through so many small towns that’ve raised the hairs on the back of my neck.” Marge waited, and the bartender loitered (just inside of earshot). “I guess,” Buck said, taking a […]

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October 21st 2016

The winter trees, dry and bitter, cracked with memory and twisted with sorrow or rage, rose up and claimed the coming season. In the forest, the others retreated, afraid and needing rest to regain their suppleness and sense of hope. The coming darkness was a time to stay indoors, but the villagers rarely listened to […]

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PART TWO: The Wrong Gods

September 25th 2016

“Did you go through the door?” the therapist asked, bringing Evie around. “What? I … oh, I’m sorry; my mind just wandered off,” she replied. “How embarrassing.” “There’s no need to be embarrassed, just continue if you can.” “Okay,” Evie said, drawing a deep breath and pulling at the long, gray braid that fell across […]

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September 24th 2016

“Throughout my life, I’ve had a recurring dream that I meet an old woman walking on a road,” Evie said quietly, looking out of the window as she spoke. “She frightens me, but I keep moving towards her.” The therapist said nothing. “In the early dreams, she reached out to me, but I rushed past […]

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