Tansy Undercrypt
Author, Illustrator, Purveyor of Doom & Whimsy


February 6th 2018

She worked hard on the letter, writing and re-writing it until the words struck a balance between the misery of life, the fiery end of days, and God’s love; she then duplicated it in her own hand on notebook paper – one for every neighbor on her block. It was important to tell them about […]

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Letters from Krampus #5

December 24th 2017

Children, Look, I know that I’m old and it may be tempting to say, “What does a sack-lugging goat demon know about how hard my life is?”, but I get it. 
I actually get it. 
 What astounds me is how few of you pick harmony over truly bad behavior. You’re all lovely meat puppets […]

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Letters from Krampus #4

December 17th 2017

Dear Zimmer, Uh. Wow. You … okay.
 Thank you for saying that I’m “better than What’s-His-Claus” for my understanding of the darkness in human beings. 
This is undeniably true and no one has ever just put it out there in writing. I don’t mind telling you that my greatest challenge on most days is not […]

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Letters from Krampus #3

December 10th 2017

Dear Donna, What does “Krampusnacht” mean? Well, roughly translated, it’s: “Get in the sack, you little shit.” It’s a special time where all of the vile terrors roaming the planet in girl and boy form get to pause and ask themselves, “Will he get me this year or will he not?”. I eventually get all […]

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Letters from Krampus #2

December 3rd 2017

Dear Ethan, I was deeply touched by your letter. It’s been a long time since I’ve received a rant of defiance – something that condemns the whole being-good-for-fabulous-cash-and-prizes system. The blurry black and white picture of your butt from the library photocopier … well, I got choked up. You’ve got style, kid, and you’re going […]

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Letters from Krampus #1

November 26th 2017

So it begins. I was in the middle of a lovely dream (where Santa met me halfway in the technology-is-our-friend argument and replaced my stupid pitchfork and burlap sack with a laser cannon and spirit reclamation unit from “Ghostbusters”) when the first bag of mail arrived. Perhaps unfairly, Shelley, I hate you in advance (because […]

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November 9th 2017

“Look at this,” Jessica said to Ethan and Parker, coming into the living room with a pile of notebooks. “Mom’s letters to the dead.” They stopped packing boxes and turned to her. “Wow,” Ethan said, walking over. “She wrote a letter to someone every day (instead of writing a traditional diary),” Parker remembered. “Yes,” Jessica […]

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September 20th 2017

“I cannot tell you what I know,” the letter began, “but I can share what you do not.” The old paper was soft and so delicate that some feared the act of reading would tear it. “Death is a minor inconvenience and that about sums it up. The world is all about checks and balances, […]

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August 7th 2017

They trudged sullenly to the grave, plopping down a tissue cone of gas station flowers onto the lip of the granite stone. They lulled about for a bit, distracted by thoughts of what they could be doing, when Linda noticed a dusty notecard (addressed to them) was wedged into the edging around the picture at […]

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May 15th 2017

She hit “Send” and sighed. This was hard (much harder than she thought) and it was getting old. “Maybe no more personals ads,” she said to herself. “I’m just not meeting the right kind of people.” She poured milk onto her cereal and sat down to eat it. “Same thing every time,” she whispered. “It […]

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