Tansy Undercrypt
Author, Illustrator, Purveyor of Doom & Whimsy
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February 11th 2016 in Microfiction

“Carl, you have to open your fortune cookie,” Michael said with a grin. “It’s required, Carl,” Tina added (also grinning). “I never do,” Carl said flatly, “you guys always open it and read it for me.” “And we’re not doing that today, old man,” Michael said, pushing the cookie across the table. “It’s time to […]

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February 10th 2016

“This is an amazing collection,” he said, going from frame to frame down the hallway. “Are these wine labels?” “Cargo labels,” came the reply, “from every country my coffin’s ever been shipped to.” A silence fell between them. “And so then what happened?” the therapist probed gently. “What always happens: my teeth drop down, there’s […]

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February 9th 2016

“Mr. Meriwether, where is Miss Gladstrup?” came a tense voice rounding the corner of the shed. “She’s on her way to the meadow with the children, Matron; they passed here not ten minutes ago,” Meriwether responded, removing his cap to address her. “My God, no!” Matron yelled, turning on her heels and running for the […]

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February 8th 2016

They watched the police handcuff Lana and escort her out the front door to the waiting car. “Unbelievable,” Robert said, shaking his head. “I didn’t see that one coming.” “Her epic life of crime?” Amy asked, laughing. “I think that’s usually kept secret for a reason.” Robert smiled. “I’m shocked is all,” he said. “I […]

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Letters from Management #6

February 7th 2016

To the attention of: Dr. Erwin Schrodinger Esteemed Sir, Thank you for your recent inquiry. While we are eager to provide you with a quote for our services, we must settle the issue of animals living on the property. Do you, Sir, have a cat in residence with you at the lab or do you […]

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February 6th 2016

“What have you got there, buddy?” Mike asked Hank the Hound, who held a dead bird very proudly in his mouth. Shelly screamed and ran out of the kitchen with clear instructions to take care of the problem; Hannah looked on from the breakfast nook, eating her oatmeal slowly. Mike coaxed the bird away from […]

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February 5th 2016

Ernestine brought a tiny bottle from the hutch in the dining room; she cradled it tenderly in her cupped hands. “Good heavens, what’s that?” Bonnie asked. “Is that moonshine?” Ernestine laughed. “Everybody knows that moonshine comes in a jug.” She sat the bottle down on the tray very carefully. “You were saying how much you […]

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February 4th 2016

The squad car lights illuminated the back county road and all of the dense trees arching up over it. Officer Marvin got out slowly, keeping a light touch on his holster. “You guys LARPing or something?” There was no response. He carefully approached the guy in the massive horned helmet riding a … stag? “Nice […]

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February 3rd 2016

She found two dead wolves on the path and started to run. The webs in this part of the forest were enormous and so dense you could not see through them. She ran, not looking when a shadow shifted to her right, fearing she would come undone. Racing to the cottage, she was relieved that […]

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