Tansy Undercrypt
Author, Illustrator, Purveyor of Doom & Whimsy

Advice

December 31st 2015

“Don’t throw up,” they said to Patrick (who was already, at 12, The Nervous Type). “And don’t swear,” they said to Claire (who was, at 15, a Different Type Entirely). Aunt Rose answered the door and the kids noticed (with relief) that Uncle John was already fast asleep in his favorite chair. They watched a […]

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Selection

December 30th 2015

Rory hurried back to his apartment, not stopping to accept the good-natured teasing of folks he knew waiting in line. “I’ve seen it 11 times,” he said in his head. “Yes, it’s good; yes, even Sarah will like it.” At home, he rushed to the couch and woke his laptop. “Two tonight – two at […]

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Faces

December 29th 2015

“It’s called Paranoid Pareidolia or Pareidoliaphobia – the fear of seeing faces in everyday objects,” the doctor said. “It’s common enough to have a name?” Ellen asked. “It’s very common in children, actually. As they develop a visual dictionary to pair with growing verbal skills, the brain goes into overdrive applying patterns looking for anything […]

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Reset

December 28th 2015

After the behavior had continued for some time, he called a meeting. “Look,” he said, “I know that having adventures can be exciting and incredibly rewarding if what you’re looking for is found.” Everyone nodded enthusiastically. “But,” he continued, “not every single day and not every single time I’m away from you for two minutes.” […]

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Letters from Krampus #5

December 27th 2015

(Krampus, his seasonal job with the Santa Claus Corporation now ended, packs up his desk and heads to Florida for the winter [big Krampen community down there].) “Dear Arthur, Look, you were good enough, all right? I’m extremely busy, and I’m not going to waste my time with some dweeb who’s “on the line”. You’re […]

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Childhood

December 26th 2015

At sundown, they heard the horses coming from the mountain and hid inside of their homes. The sound of Dracula’s carriage speeding from the castle abruptly stopped, there was silence, and then back went the horses from whence they came. A bit later, the sound of hooves on frozen ground returned – and then, as […]

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Forever

December 25th 2015

Bear watched from afar with great patience and tenderness as his friend lived out the rest of her life and prepared to leave it. When the moment came, he rushed to the lake where he knew she would be, and sat wiggling with excitement in front of the tiny house he’d recreated from memories of […]

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Gifts

December 24th 2015

“Hey, man, you’re hitting the fish sauce pretty hard over here,” Yog-Sothoth said quietly to Dagon, who’d propped himself up by the window and was draining the punch bowl. “You’re going to miss the opening of the gifts.” “Who cares?” came the slurred reply. “We’re just going to get eaten anyway.” “Now, you don’t know […]

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Thief

December 23rd 2015

The package thief came to a quick stop, lights off, in front of the house. He paid no attention to the mattress in the corner of the yard (although it was unusual in such an upscale neighborhood); he scaled the front steps in one jump and opened the bin quickly to see what had been […]

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Belief

December 22nd 2015

They looked in on the little ones, cozy in their beds, deeply asleep. Smiling, they went out to sit around the tree, watching the snow fall. “They grow up so fast, ” she said, happy and sad at the same time. “I know,” he replied. “I suppose we’re at the end of the Santa thing.” […]

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